A, E, I, O, U and Oftentimes - Why?

Ability, Empathy, Instinct, Opportunity, Understanding: What do these words mean to you?   
 

We all have the ability to be empathetic, to use our instincts, to step through a door or, at the very least, a window of opportunity that is open to us; and the capacity of understanding to accept another’s point of view. Why, then, is it often a struggle? Why is there a “why” here? What aren’t we seeing and what is missing from an equation that should be written in black and white but is a constant inhabitant of the many-shades-of-grey world?

The answer is: FREEDOM. Our God given right is freedom: Freedom of choice, freedom of thought - the freedoms of ability, empathy, instinct, opportunity and understanding.

Freedoms that dwell in our minds and emotions; the emancipation of a network of thoughts that are liberated each time we make a choice and own it are the “Why” of what we do and is the variant in this equation.

·      Why do our innate abilities lay dormant?

·      Why is it difficult to show empathy for another?

·      Why do we ignore our instincts that surface at the right time?

·      Why is opportunity quashed, waiting for a time that never again comes knocking at our door?

·      Why does understanding manifest as a one-way street that we travel, looking to be understood but choosing to not understand others?

Answers to YOUR Why’s

The universe is energy. Our thoughts are energy. Our actions, our words, our physical world, all =  energy. Once you grasp this concept your own personal world starts to shift, and understanding occurs. However, understanding will never take place unless you use your time wisely and start to think about what you want in your life - what needs to be manifested to have that better life.

There is an inner world and an outer world in each one of our lives. Too often we look in when we should be looking out and look out when we should be looking inward. Why this occurs is due to the juxtaposition of our thoughts and, seemingly, needs at that time. This is why thinking about what you want to draw to you is vital.

When Should We Look Inward? 

To continue to grow we need to look inward.  Just as a seed begins to grow while nestled in the fertile soil of Mother Earth, we begin to grow when we think about what it is we want to accomplish.

When we choose to forget about anything else and focus on improving our own life, this is the pivotal moment when the tiny first green shoot finally springs forth from the seedpod. Building character, learning empathy, recognizing and taking full advantage of our abilities, and understanding when opportunities are ripe and perfect for the taking, comes from within. It’s where you make your personal foundation strong and purposeful.

What’s Left for Looking Outward?

Looking outward is of equal importance. People, nature, life – it’s all out there ready to be experienced, enjoyed and to be used for the inward growth afterward. Looking at your surroundings helps keep you aware of where you are needed, what needs to be done and supplies some of those opportunities to better yourself while enjoying life and living it to the fullest.  

It can seem a little complicated but in reality it’s not. When you start and end your day looking within, the time spent looking outside yourself becomes material for your inner growth. The universe is uncomplicated – we just make it so.

To learn more about and understand others, we need to learn more about ourselves. It’s a natural progression. We learn our ABC’s to write words. We learn words to write sentences. And we learn to write sentences to create the wonderful world of literature.

Think of your personal growth, one idea, one deed at a time and you will be the author of a life of beauty and fulfillment – for yourself and others.

You will then know the greatest energy of all: living in purposeful balance with the universe.

A Common "Goal"

I was speaking with an old friend today. We got around to talking about faith and I really liked what he had to say. Bear in mind that we are different in so many ways:

1. He's a man,  I'm a woman
2. He's tall, I'm vertically challenged (okay, short)
3. He was raised Catholic, I was born of the Jewish faith
4. He knows how to play hockey, I only know how to play hooky

Anyway, you get my point. We're different. But what he had to say made so much sense and logically erased the faith/religion barrier.  His analogy comes from the game of hockey. It's simple and, the way he said it, quite eloquent (for a hockey jock, that is).

"We all love the game of hockey, we're just playing on different teams."

"We all love the game of hockey, we're just playing on different teams."

When he said this, he was referring to himself being Catholic and me being Jewish but having faith in the same God. In his analogy hockey is symbolic of the deity and the different colored jerseys (teams) the various religions. He rambled off Catholicism, Judaism, Baha'i and a couple of others.

The message is clear: It doesn't matter which team we're playing for because we all have the love of the game.

Translation: It doesn't matter whether we pray in a temple or meditate in a tepee because we all have love for God.

So, if we're all praying to the same pure light and energy source, why can't we all just get along?

"The only way to make sure people you agree with can speak is to support the rights of people you don't agree with."      — Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama

There's Two Sides to Everything, and We're Not Talking 'Slaw and Fries!

'Slaw and fries on opposite sides!

When you hear the words, "You're entitled to your opinion," do you ever stop to think about what is being said? What message is being sent? It's an unfinished statement. Too often there's a "but" that follows and, of course, you hear the opinion. Their side. You may be the coleslaw, but they're talkin' fries.

I wrote a little bit about this a year or two ago. It was about perspective. The example I used was watching a hockey game (my son was playing defense). The ref made a call that everyone in the surrounding bleachers, including me, thought was a really bad one. At the very same time, however, the family and friends watching from the adjacent bleachers were excited and clapping, supporting the ref's decision. We were outraged! How could one be so blind? So oblivious?

Well, it's really easy to have an opinion that makes no sense to someone else. While we're asking them to try and see it from our perspective, we're ignoring the fact that they want us to do the same thing. Everyone has an agenda.
Sometimes people try to cut deals. "Just listen to what I have to say first and see if you don't agree with me. Then I'll be more than happy to listen to what you have to say." Easier said than done. Everyone wants to go first - to have their say before the other gets a chance to speak.

No matter which side makes their case first, the outcome is already predetermined - 'slaw's sticking with mayo and fries are cozying up with ketchup!
 
How can this two-sided arena come to an agreement? Will it end in the old standby, "We'll just have to agree to disagree?" Perhaps. But there are a couple of ways to get around this. They take practice and lots of resolve but they do work.

'Slaw and fries hanging out with no sandwich buffer-zone?

You First
 Two words. Simple. Polite. Respectful. Allows for the other to make their case without having to agree to hear you out first. Believe it or not, you've already made yourself heard louder and clearer than pushing for top billing.
Restrict
This takes more practice, but is amazingly successful. Don' t share your opinion. Seriously. Don't speak. Listen to your friend, nod, smile and let it go. If pressed, do not react. A genuine message such as, "You have an interesting take. I'd like to think about it" can end things peaceably.

Perspective, peace-keeping, positive, proactive. Call it what you may – it makes sense.
'Slaw and fries hanging out with no sandwich buffer-zone? Stranger things have happened!

Independence Day – One Day At a Time

There is a particular quality of emotion that is evoked when the strains of national anthems begin and slowly build to a crescendo. Around the world the sentimental pieces of music, sung in hundreds of languages, are typically a part of elaborately planned celebrations that speak of pride of country and loyalty to its representatives. Yesterday, April 15th, was Israel's Independence Day. In July, both Canada and the United States of America will celebrate their own on the 1st and 4th respectively.

When countries celebrate their independence it is a massive production involving millions of citizens coming together, supportive of government and one another. Many in number they are united and strong, forming a mighty fortress, human brick by human brick. The celebrations are a time to enjoy music and dance, wear festive costumes, eat special foods and watch the night come alive as fireworks explode in colorful configurations.

Yet, not all Independence Days are noted on calendars. Most are celebrated alone. These hard-earned, noteworthy events draw little attention and are usually celibate celebrations. So many brave soldiers have never set foot on foreign soil. For many, the hardest battles are fought from within.

On any given day, though you would never know it, there are parents, children, teachers, neighbors and friends fighting for their lives. We see it on TV, read about it in the newspapers and witness it in the streets. Predators in all disguises: alcohol, drugs, domestic violence, disorders, sexual battery, prostitution, diseases and phobias. Some of the predators don't seem as alarming: unhappy at home, dissatisfied at work, verbal abuse, but they take their toll as well.

The day an individual says, "No more" and resists their personal demons, overcomes the unbelievable fatigue associated with their battle and removes them self from the horrible fear that has weighed them down for far too long, is their Independence Day. Your loyalty to yourself is your own magnificent Independence Day.

Your heart and good nature were never intended to be trampled upon, used and left in the dirt. It is the part of you that beats the rhythm of calm as easily as the uneven syncopation of stress and fear. Your anxieties were never meant to be handled alone. And your suffering can be history as you plant your flag and claim your Independence Day.

April is National Rebuilding Month. Think about how you want to rebuild yourself, your life, your independence. Not all building is done with brick and mortar.

Side effects include: a deep sense of pride, increased self-worth, calm, inner peace and happiness.

Fireworks optional.

In the Driver's Seat

On the open road of life, more often than not, we occupy the passenger seat. It's not always a comfortable place to be, but it serves a purpose. 

• It teaches us to give up control and enjoy the ride. 
• It also teaches us to observe others as they handle situations; to use this time to strengthen our own decision-making skills.
• The passenger's seat gives us opportunity to relinquish, relax and restore our faith in others as they man the helm. 

Everybody wants to be in the driver's seat - it's the place of power. The place where you get to ask the questions and make the calls. Or is it?

Remember Driving Miss Daisy? Who drove and who controlled? Miss Daisy barked out orders from the back seat while quiet and accommodating Mr. Hoke Colburn took it in stride, at the wheel of the car; never complaining and almost always remaining calm.

Perhaps you're now confused. So who does hold the position of power? The driver? The passenger? The boss? The employee? The horse? The jockey?

It may seem pretty confusing, but it's really quite simple. Let's take another walk down Memory Lane. Remember the old Certs commercial: Certs is a breath mint, no Certs is a candy mint. Certs is two, two, two mints in one? Did one aspect override the other or did they provide dual functions that worked well together?

It doesn't really matter who appears to be in the driver's seat. The fact remains that a carriage isn't going anywhere without the horse, yet the driver controls the ride. Being in the driver's seat is a huge responsibility but it can never replace the importance of the passenger. What's a taxi driver without a paying customer? Just a driver out for a ride.

Whether you're in command, second in line or at the very end of the line, each position has a reason, a right and a responsibility to the others. When life is in balance, everyone's true purpose becomes clear and apparent. When we recognize that we are where we are supposed to be, that is when life makes sense, becomes easier and is purposeful. That is the real power.

And I Knew

Met a man today
Lying in the street
His clothes were tattered
He'd nothing to eat
But he looked at me
With a smile so sweet
And I knew that he was special

Met a woman today
On a bench in the park
Her shopping cart empty
Her future rather stark
But she looked at me
With eyes that held a spark
And I knew that she was special

Met a child today
Face pressed against a pane
His clothes soaking wet
As he stood out in the rain
But he looked at me
With a love he couldn't feign
And I knew that he was special

Met a person today
That I've known for years
For the first time, though
I could see through her fears
And she looked at me
With a smile in spite of tears
And I knew that I was special

Compassion is for everyone and that includes you! Random Acts of Kindness Week, February 10-16, Be kind to others – be kind to yourself .....

The Four-One-One on God

What is the process by which we find out more about something? Nowadays it is an extension of our fingertips. Technology and information is a click away. A nano-pause and a blink. Presto. You now have thousands of references directly in the palm of your hand.

A few years back it involved a trip to the library or, at the very least, a walk to the living room to fact check in the family's proudly displayed Encylopaedia Britannica or World Book Encyclopedia. Often friends didn't own such a splendid set of reference books and had to make an appointment to borrow one of the coveted volumes. Some families insisted that the friend conduct their research right then and there. The books never left the house.

Yet, if you go back even further, back to a time when books were limited and computers, handheld devices and the like did not exist, what was the path to enlightenment? How did one glean information, gain knowledge on any one topic? What was de rigeur when fact finding, discovering or verifying? How did one conduct any sort of research?

The 4-1-1 of the Physical World
Once upon a time, people had to physically search out answers to their questions: What happens when you reach the horizon, what determines gender, is there a God? These were big questions and, while some have been well researched and absolutely determined at this point in time, others still  remain a mystery – a mystery because the physical world does not reveal all.

Magellan and Elcano circumnavigated the globe back in the 6th century. It was a practical, hands-on experiment that did not go awry! It proved to the world that the earth was a sphere, not a plane that abruptly ended. Miescher, Watson and Crick all played a prominent role in the discovery of DNA. DNA is responsible for identifying, among other things, gender.

Listen to Your Left Chevron Three

But what about God? Is there an answer? Does God exist? Probably the biggest, deepest, most mystical, spiritual, unanswerable question ever posed. Who among us has the answer?

Quoted Charles M. Schultz, "I know the answer! The answer lies within the heart of all mankind! The answer is twelve? I think I'm in the wrong building." 

Mr. Schultz juxtaposed a profound thought with a side note of humor, buffering a serious and long researched subject that continues to baffle humankind. Yet the answer is partially revealed in this quote. All of life and its contents are researched in the physical world. To find the intangibles one must look within. Note that Mr. Schultz states, "within the heart of all mankind." It is collaborative, not singular. Perhaps this is a little hint of a major find – we are all connected.

"God sleeps in the minerals, awakens in plants, walks in animal and thinks in man." 
                                                                                                               – Arthur Young

You might question Mr. Schultz's authority on this topic, but you cannot ignore the fact that until Magellan successfully circumnavigated the globe, there existed no prior proof of his capabilities. However, he was able to manifest a result in the physical world. How do we receive a definitive answer to the question, "Does God exist?" And if you question Mr. Schultz's significance in this discussion, and rightly you should, where is there some combined spiritual and scientific research that gives even the tiniest glimpse into the most profound question of all time? Certainly a cartoonist cannot and does not hold the key to the question of all time?

"The key to wisdom is this – constant and frequent questioning, for by doubting we are led to question and by questioning we arrive at the truth."       – Peter Abelard

There are many books on this subject, however, one stands out brightly among the rest. You might try picking up a copy of Uell S. Andersen's Three Magic Words. I highly recommend it as one of the foremost tomes on this topic. He reveals a wealth of insight into the 4-1-1 on God. While a definitive answer does not lie behind door number one, two or three, this book offers some very profound thoughts and concepts on the subject. It's a good place to start your own spiritual conquest.